THE PICKUP

When we got to Eastern that Saturday at 11:50am the front doors were locked. We headed around back to see the foster dad, the foster mom (Mr. and Mrs. Kim), Jessica and two Eastern workers that we hadn't met before. They were able to get our luggage and we were now just waiting (ended up being 20 minutes) for the driver to show up.

Jessica was handed over to me when we got there. She stayed calm for about 10 minutes with me holding her and looking around. The toughest part of this whole "final meeting" was the foster parents. Mr. Kim stayed out in their car the whole time. Previously Mrs. Kim told us that Jessica was really close to Mr. Kim. We assumed it was too tough for him emotionally, so he just stayed in the car. Mrs. Kim was visibly emotional and did breakdown as we left. This was a huge but necessary tradeoff for getting a child that received all the love they needed during that first year versus a child that received little nurturing and just sat in a corner of an orphanage staring at the walls but not having any seperation anxiety.

As hard as it was to see Mr. and Mrs. Kim struggle with saying goodbye, Julie and I would not have wanted it any other way. They spoke no english, so we always had to have a translator to assist in the communication. I think she knew that we understood and knew how much we appreciated her. I have no doubt that Mr. and Mrs. Kim will hold a special place in our hearts forever for the love they freely gave to Jessica during that first year. They are great people. Julie said the night before that what she knew she would be most emotional about was seeing Jessica's distress AS WELL AS Mrs. Kim's emotional struggles with saying goodbye. I don't think either of us realized how attached Mr. Kim was until that day.

We left Eastern with Jessica sitting on Julie lap crying for her loss with little understanding of her gain - but that we knew would sort itself out in time - and with Mrs. Kim crying as the van drove away. Jessica cried for most of the 50 minute ride to the airport.

Once we got to the airport, Julie put her in a carrier and carried Jessica on her back - which is the way Mrs. Kim explained earlier that Jessica liked to be carried. While there were intermittent sad sounds that Jessica made, for the most part, she had settled down a bit. However, we wouldn't see a smile from her the whole trip even though she seemed content and calm for most of the trip home.